Today I spent some time playing around with some numbers. I’m not a numbers person, necessarily, but I do like to understand how things fit together…forecasts and projections…expenses and potential revenue. I like to have a conceptual understanding of the bigger picture. And I have to admit, my initial reaction to the picture I was seeing wasn’t favorable.
My initial gut response was closer to panic than anything else and that feeling quickly turned to frustration…with myself. As the thoughts flooded my brain…Why hadn’t I done this sooner? Why did I just think everything was going to work in our favor? I know better than to blindly believe and make assumptions!…I decided to step away from my computer and walk the dog.
There was nothing I could do at this very moment anyway so why not step back and see if there was some new perspective to be gained.
When I got back from walking Sheba, I felt slightly better but it still felt as if there was a new weight on my shoulders that hadn’t been there before…with the recognition that I’d put it there. So I decided to go to yoga.
On the walk to the studio, I reminded myself that I’m not a dummy. If the model I had sketched out wasn’t appealing, maybe that means we need to sketch a new one…and another…and another…until we find the one that works. We’re smart…capable…there’s a way to make this work. We just have to find it.
Life…like yoga…is a practice. I rarely jump on my mat and stick every pose perfectly. I rarely jump on my mat and stick any pose perfectly! My practice is me doing the best I can, each time I come to it, with the intention of getting better…and feeling better.
So I’ve resolved myself to take this same approach with my numbers game. So what if I didn’t like what I saw at first glance? That simply means it’s time to paint a new picture…one that’s more pleasing to the eyes (and the pocketbook).